I was having a little bit of trouble coming up with new writing topics, so I asked my followers on Facebook for help. I asked for 3 words- they could be themed or completely unrelated words- and I would commit to using the 3 words with the most “likes” as a writing prompt for my next post. I received some very creative answers…some of them actually frightened me and I prayed they would not get voted in. In the end, the phrase with the most votes was “hotel room eavesdropping.” Hmmmm.
I know a lot of people have funny stories about the things they have “overheard” (intentionally or not) during a hotel stay. I wracked my brain for a hotel eavesdropping story. I’ve come up short. I think the reason I don’t have any good eavesdropping stories is because I’m usually involved in the shenanigans that are being eavesdropped on. I am not a very good bystander. I often find myself in the heart of the action, whether I like it or not.
One such story involves a hotel stay many years ago. I was working at the Marriott so I had booked a couple of rooms using my employee discount for a friend’s 21st birthday outing in Boston. Like many 21st birthday celebrations, our night ended in complete chaos. A bunch of screechy girls and a few of their boyfriends sprinkled in, had gone out for a night on the town. We came back to the hotel hot messes, of course. A trail of pink boa feathers led to our rooms. Loud laughter and drunken debauchery filled the air.
It’s all a little blurry (not just from the cheap beer but it was also over ten years ago and my old-lady memory can’t recall the all the details) but at one point, a few of us had wandered into one of the rooms where a girl happened to be with her boyfriend during a bit of a private moment. Of course, we didn’t have the good sense to leave when we realized what was going on and just made ourselves comfortable through fits of giggles. A few minutes later, a loud knock was heard at the door. I walked over and looked through the peephole. Not surprisingly, Hotel Security was standing on the other side of the door.
“Oh my GAWD!” I hissed. “The room is under MY name. Somebody help me. Someone talk to him, I can’t talk to him!” I freaked out. “Please!! One of you talk to him and get this under control.”
“Okay,” said the girl of the interrupted horizontal tango couple who had been barged in on. “I’ll talk to him. But I don’t have any pants. Give me your pants.” If sacrificing my pants was what I had to do to get out of dealing with the security man, sacrificing my pants is what I would do. I jerked my pants off and handed them to my friend, who yanked them up, opened the door, looked at the Security man and said, “I don’t know these people!”, as she pushed past him and ran down the hall, leaving me stunned and pantless. This wasn’t my room. I didn’t have any PANTS. The security man stood there waiting.
So, I wandered over to the door and mustered up as much confidence and self-respect as one could who was answering the door with no pants on in the middle of the night. “Um. Hi.”
“Miss, is this your hotel room?” he asked stone-faced.
“Um. Yes, well sorta. I mean…this is not the room that I am staying in. Otherwise, you know, I would have put a pair of pants on after mine got hijacked. But technically these rooms are in my name, yes.”
The man glared at me. “We have gotten several noise complaints from these rooms. I need you guys to keep it down- starting NOW!!”
“Yessir,” I sheepishly apologized and promised I would get everyone under control.
I closed the door behind me, mortified.
“What the HELL! I can’t believe I just had to deal with that- and PANTSLESS! You guys are the worst. Tell everyone to shut up. I’m going to wait a minute so the security guy leaves and then I’m going to back to my room. Everyone just go to sleep!” I scolded them, furious that I had to take the heat for the group.
I waited a few minutes and then cracked the door open. I stuck my head out and scampered down the hall as fast as I could with my naked booty bobbing behind me. I glanced behind me just quickly enough to see that the security man was still walking the halls, arms folded and watching my half-naked trot back to my room. Great.
My next shift at work, I got pulled aside by my boss. “Tracy, I don’t know what happened during your stay at the Boston property- and I don’t want to know. The General Manager got a letter from them and they are NOT happy with the way a Marriott employee represented this hotel. I suggest you write a letter to their GM, and to ours apologizing- and please make sure that you NEVER allow your guests to act that way in our hotels again.” I nodded, humiliated.
“Oh and Tracy?” she smirked. “Thanks for wearing pants to work today.”
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Thanks for reading! ~Tracy